Have you ever been devastated?  I mean really, really heartbroken? Deep in a valley?

I have. Its scary. It’s dark. It’s lonely. It’s terrifying, really.

And each time I’ve been there, in that scary, heartbroken place, I always wonder: Why me? Why on earth would this happen to me?

I’m in a similar valley now; a very foreign and confusing place. As I sit in this uncomfortable place so many questions start to form in my head. I tend to immediately run to friends and family looking for answers and advice. But in the end I always find myself in a conversation with God, asking Him endless questions, hoping He will answer. And as I ask God to start to reveal what He is doing in my life through this hard time, I begin to feel a peace in the midst of my confusion and a comfort in my soul that reminds me I’m not alone. It’s feeling I can’t explain other than the still small voice of God saying: “Hana, I am keeping you from something you cannot see and you do not understand right now, but I am also keeping you for something. Something amazing. Something I have equipped and designed you for.  Something better than anything you could come up with on your own. Trust me.”

We as women will walk dark roads. Rough roads full of questions, fears, and confusions, but in the midst of those roads I truly believe we need to remember and find hope that we are being kept and guarded. Kept from things we don’t quite understand or things we are just not ready to see. Things that we may not be ready to handle at this point in our lives. Not only should we remember that we are being kept and guarded from the unseen, but we are also being kept for something. Something wonderful. Something HUGE. And that’s exciting! It may not look the way we think it will, but through faith, we can trust that as we walk these bumpy roads that there are unseen arms guiding us, holding us, and carrying us through. If we hold this posture of trust, on the other side of heartbreak there will be restoration and mending; on the other side of darkness and confusion there will be peace and light.

I’ve always been told when things like job opportunities fall through, or relationships don’t turn out the way you thought they should, or when hard things happen in my family life that it “just wasn’t the right timing,”or “better luck next time!” But I have always felt like there was more to what was going on in those situations than these surface explanations.

In these tough times I begin to think about the idea of being guarded, or “kept.” The idea that maybe the dream job that you thought you were perfect for was really a nightmare job, and it would have sucked the life right out of you. Or the boy you were convinced you were suppose to marry was not at all what was going to be good or right for you.

It doesn’t take away the initial hurt or sadness, but I promise, if you hold onto the idea of being “kept,” you will see that through the confusion of being held FROM something you can not see, you are also being kept and held FOR something. And this “something” is so much greater than anything you could even think up.  Believe me, I’ve thought up some pretty great scenarios for my life. But nothing compared to what I am being shaped and kept for by a God who sees all and knows all. A God who’s love runs deep. This I know to be true.

Photo Credit: Natalia Klimova Photography